I envy your demise

One day after school, Scott was mad. He saw me wave at my old friend Jen. We fought for hours over a wave. 

We fought again the next day. And the next. 

Once after school I went to The Pod, where he was living, to see him. He came out and his eyes were huge. I asked him what was up and he told me that Justine picked him up the night before and got him to snort meth with her and her friends. I was so mad. But he was in a very good mood. It was such a relief to be with him when he was happy. He told me he wasn't going to do it again and that he did it for me. He wanted to be nice to me. He did drugs so it would put him in a good mood. I said nothing more about it. Especially since he told me that Justine and her boyfriend were moving out of town.

But the good mood didn’t last. His license expired so now he couldn't buy cigarettes. I told him he needed to quit smoking and he flew off the handle. He said it was the only thing he had left.

We fought for days again. I told a friend what was going on at school one day and she gave me a couple of cigarettes for him. He was raining when school let out. On the drive to The Pod, I lit one of the cigarettes. When I got there, I crushed the rest of the cigarette in his ashtray, took out the other and crushed it too. Scott lost it. He threw an empty vodka bottle at my head, and fell over the ashtray. He picked up what was left and tried to fix it. Then he smoked what he could. We screamed at each other until the land lord told us to leave or be quiet. Scott stormed outside in the rain. it was dark by now. He grabbed a rope and climbed up on the roof. He disappeared for a long time. I called his name. No answer. I tried to climb up too but I wasn't tall enough. Finally he appeared. He yelled down that he made a noose and was going to kill himself. His black trench coat was blowing in the wind. He let his hair down and it blew around messily. We were both soaking wet. I pleaded with him to come down. I told him I would get him some cigarettes. I would be 18 in a few days and would buy them for him.

I lived up to my promise. On my 18th birthday I went to the store with Scott and bought him some Camels. Things were better between us now. He even got me a rose for my birthday. I don't know how he did that and I didn't ask.

One day, as I waited for Scott to finish giving plasma, I saw someone stumbling down the alley. It was an old friend we had made back at Paul and Victoria’s house named Kermit. I went to him. He had a deep gash from his wrist to his elbow. He was crying that it stopped bleeding and he couldn’t die. I cleaned him up and brought him inside. Scott came back and Kermit explained to us that Ninja was back on drugs. The reason he left South Dakota was to get away from them. Not only that, but he had hooked him, Melissa, and our old friend Sam on meth. Scott lost his mind.